#EXISTENTIALISM #ANXIETY or OCD #ABSURD
#LellePodupu |My high school friend-daughter, who is currently studying medicine, is taking counseling for OCD. After a few sessions, my friend asked me to talk to her. While we were talking about everything, he said, “Why are they so afraid? There is nothing to be afraid of. It’s just their delusion.” “That’s true… It could be an illusion. Fear is real. Pain is real. Pain and fear have no reason. She will get even more scared if you try to tell her that it’s all an illusion.” I said. “How is that?” he asked.
It was 1986. We were studying in a small village in the present Mulugu district, on the Chhattisgarh border. At that time, it was in Khammam district. Before Chhattisgarh was formed, it was on the Madhya Pradesh border. Dense forest. On the other side of the border is Bastar district. Koyas were abundant in that area. Although Koyas were generally backward, some were able to pursue education due to government assistance. Every Tuesday, a fair was held in our village. They would come from the surrounding Koya huts and sell the gum and honey they had earned from the forest in this village at the tribal corporation. They would also sell bamboo mats and baskets in the fair and buy essential commodities with the money they earned.
However, that fair was very crowded. People would push each other around. Once inside the fair, it was impossible to cross the fair without bumping into anyone. Sometimes we would challenge each other to cross the fair without bumping into anyone. But it was not possible. Sometimes, Gothi Koyas would also come to such fairs. The Gothi Koyas in that area were more backward than normal Koyas. They lived entirely in the forests of Bastar. They did not understand Telugu. Even ordinary Koyas were afraid of Gothi Koyas. The reason for this was the small conflicts that had taken place between the respective tribes in the past. Gothi Koyas did not trust anyone. At that time, they used to carry arrows with them.
There was a rumor circulating in the villages about Gothi Koyas. It was spread that they sacrifice people to their gods through a process called ‘Lelle Podupu.’ Lelle Podupu means that they prick a person without their knowledge with a thin, sharp object like a needle and collect one or two drops of blood. They write the blood collected on a specially brought leaf and take it to their deity and worship it. By worshiping in this way, just as the leaf dries up day by day, the person whose blood is collected also dries up. They dry up and dry up and finally die. Although there is no truth in this, this kind of superstition was spread.
Sometimes, when the fair was going on, there would be a rumor that ‘the Koalas have come and are poking each other.’ And that’s it… the crowd in the fair would suddenly decrease. I don’t know if someone was spreading the rumor intentionally or if it was a coincidence. When such a rumor came, everyone who went to the fair would check themselves for any wounds. They would try to remember if they had ever been pricked with a needle in the fair. If anyone had a small scratch or felt like they had been pricked by a needle, they would live in extreme fear from that moment on. Some would even perform an antidote puja.
We, who were 12-13 years old, used to roam freely at that time. Going to the fair, going to the Godavari River, walking along the streams, and walking along the forests and hills gave us joy. At that age, when the rumor of this Koyala came, I couldn’t sleep after going home due to extreme fear. My body would shake and get hot. If I tell adults, we will spend sleepless nights due to fear. Somehow, that fear would go away after a while. But when that fear was there, it was very difficult.
When I tell this incident to my childhood friend and now recall that incident, I laugh. But at that time, the same truth was true for our minds. Whatever we believe to be true is true for the brain. The way the brain behaves depends on what the person believes and has nothing to do with physical truth. Therefore, people suffering from OCD cannot be understood if analyzed from a normal social perspective. That is why a subject called psychology is necessary for humanity.
#HariRaghav 17.08.2020
