Since childhood, we have heard the word “bond” (or bandham) in numerous contexts. We frequently hear of various types of bonds—most notably, the bond between husband and wife (a bond of love) and the bond between siblings. This is precisely what is depicted in movies as well.
In rural villages, cows can sometimes become quite restless or hyperactive. In such instances—particularly when they need to be milked—their legs are tied together; this restraint, too, is referred to as a “bond.” What does this bond do? It keeps the two legs bound together, preventing them from moving apart. Bonds in our own lives function in much the same way: they keep us emotionally tethered, preventing us from drifting away.
Essentially, a bond serves to curtail one’s freedom.
“Bondage” and “freedom” are two diametrically opposed concepts. The deeper we become entangled in bonds—such as those of marriage or friendship—the greater the likelihood that we will, in turn, forfeit our freedom.The deeper the bond we forge, the more freedom we forfeit.
One cannot marry and simultaneously expect to retain absolute freedom; it is simply not possible. Nor can one enter a job and demand complete liberty. Similarly, being in a friendship precludes the possibility of unbridled freedom. Regardless of the nature of the relationship, it is impossible to remain entirely free. By its very definition, a relationship implies that I am mortgaging my freedom in exchange for the benefits you provide me.
What constitutes a romantic relationship? It is an agreement wherein I pledge certain personal benefits—my freedom, in part—in exchange for romance, pleasure, and intimacy. Marriage, too, is fundamentally a contract: I am wagering my freedom for your sake. What does an employer do? They enter into an agreement to provide an employee with a sum of money in exchange for their services.
A person may relinquish their freedom for the sake of the Telugu Desam Party or any other political party—essentially, for the sake of an ideology. Whenever we surrender our freedom for the sake of something—be it a cause, a person, or an institution—a bond is inevitably formed. The extent to which you forge such a bond directly corresponds to the extent of freedom you ultimately lose.
From a practical standpoint, the degree of bonding we choose to undertake should be determined by the extent of freedom we are willing to mortgage. It is futile to forge a bond completely—committing oneself fully—only to subsequently lament the loss of one’s freedom.
Bondage and Freedom. Bondage and Freedom.
